The Climb

Let me share a mountain top experience with you. literally.

3 weeks before I left Uganda, God was revealing himself to me more than I had ever experienced in my entire life.

Why was God doing this?

Because I prayed a prayer. A extremely hard and emotional prayer.
I surrender all.
I surrender my home, my family, my friends.. My boyfriend who I love to death and want to have a life with.. I surrender and I want to be obedient to you and stop being bitter and ignoring you. I want to follow your call and live in Uganda.

That same day after praying that prayer, and still feeling bitter and upset because I knew what I was losing...
But I didn't know what I was gaining..

A friend from my church came to me and told me he wanted to take me somewhere, that God wants to show me something.

We climbed to the top of a very steep hill it was a beautiful climb but it was also steep and tiring and it took effort and good physical ability to get to the top. Not everyone would have been fit to make that specific climb to the top of that hill.

Sometimes life is a climb.. Not to steal Miley Cyrus's lyrics...

Sometimes life is tiring and we can't see how far we have until we get to the top and we are living in the unknown. That's when we learn to trust on God to take care of everything.

Sometimes it takes effort and hard work to get to the top. But sometimes. When you are physically fit with the strength of Jesus Christ. It takes hardly any effort at all because he prepared you with everything that you need. He constructed every muscle in your body perfectly for that climb.

When you let Jesus take over and do all the work, then all you have to do is sit back and enjoy the climb and appreciate the view as you work to the top... I'm sorry... As GOD works you to the top.

Because why exhaust yourself by doing it all in your own strength? After all even Miley Cyrus knows "there's always gonna be another mountain" and "you're always gonna want to make it move."

Let go and let God.

This is what he has taught me. What he is still teaching me.

But let me tell you what God told me when I reached the top of that hill.

In school growing up I always struggled with body image and not being good enough or pretty enough or skinny enough and it really took a beating on my confidence and self esteem.

Only Jesus knows how much I struggled with that.

As the years go one I realize more and more that I wasn't alone in feeling that way.

When we reached the top of the hill I looked out over the whole view of Kampala and I literally gasped at its beauty. I could see from the lake all the way across Kampala. All the rolling hills and glorious clouds covering the city.

And then he said, " God wanted me to take you here and show you this, because God wants you to know this is how beautiful you are to him."

Wow. The God who created the universe and all it's glory wanted me to know that I am also his creation and I am just as beautiful. Words can't describe what this meant to me.

And God thinks that about YOU too.

Then God revealed something else to me as I was looking out over Kampala. I actually said out loud. Wow it really is beautiful. I struggled before this with seeing the beauty in Uganda. I was bitter and I didn't want to fall in love with a country that would take me away from everything I have ever known.

I'm not like most missionaries that fell in love with the country as soon as they got off the plane. It was dirty and poverty stricken and painful and smelled bad... And I had to be on guard at all times (or so I thought) ..

It wasn't home.

It wasn't comfortable or relaxed.

Looking out over Kampala that day, God said this is your new home, and my heart sank and as soon as it did. God broke my fall and I landed in his arms and my whole body was covered with peace and all I saw was beauty.

For the first time in my life. I saw beauty in Kampala. In uganda. The same beauty I saw in the children and people that I loved. But now God was showing me the beauty of the entirety of Uganda.

And I let go and allowed myself to fall in love and Jesus gifted me with Peace and Grace to endure.

I'm still learning and growing but when I let God have full control and domain over my everyday life that's where true Joy comes from. Even when times get tough and my heart starts to drift. Jesus never fails to pull me back in and lovingly shows me truth and reminds me how beautiful and important I am to him.